About Me

I am beyond vexed that the lottery has not made me a winner. I am not greedy for millions ~my needs are simple: good books, better wine, and a new vehicle.

Sunday, November 29, 2009

Friday, September 11, 2009

Ringing The Bell Of Idiocy

On the second viewing of Rep.Joe Wison sticking his butt in his mouth during the President's speech, I looked only at Joe Biden and Nancy Pelosi. The VP had that "Dad's going to deal with you later" expression and Pelosi's glare could have frozen Hellfire. I'm hoping to replicate her look the next time The Minion misbehaves. Surely he will pee himself in fear. I know I would.

Sunday, September 6, 2009

Margaret and Helen

Helen's latest blog entry. She ripped the words right out of my mouth. My dearly departed mother would have loved this. She was a feisty old lady who spoke in much the same way.

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

She Says She Was "Surprised".

Knocked up again.

There wouldn't be a surprise if you stop humping like rabid weasels. Or wrap that bad boy. Or get a freaking IUD. But apparently the adherents of the QuiverFull brand of religion do not encourage family planning. Carbon footprint? Carbon freaking stampede.

Friday, August 14, 2009

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

The Herd of Unwashed

17 years ago, at the age of 23, I was hiking the Applachian Trail from Georgia to Maine. It doesn't feel that long ago. This is the time of year the hikers come through our town and if I see them in the store or laundrymat I ask them if they need a ride to the post office, back to the trailhead, etc. I tell them what year I hiked, and then I feel really old. Sigh.

Saturday, July 4, 2009

Anonymous Thoughts on the Sarah Palin Resignation

I came across this gem while reading comments on themudflats.net.

" i don’t know how you alaskans dealt with her before McCain put her on the map. all i know is that i am so so sorry that you were forced to endure her reign; it must have been like being led by a muppet. a corrupt muppet. in evil high heels. "

Corrupt muppets in evil high heels. This person is quite possibly my soulmate.

Thursday, June 18, 2009

The Shame of Rabbit Hoarding

At times I think I'm a bit odd. But this lady has me beat.

We should all embrace the quirks that make us who we are...but without jail-time.

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Currently On My Nightstand

Just a bit of light reading. It's good to file info away in the grey cells.

Saturday, May 16, 2009

Quote : "They can live for up to a year without food."

Sweet hopscotching Jesus! Did anyone else see the Bedbug Article? I'm going to doom our luck now and state for the record that The Minion has never gotten headlice. And as far as I know we have never experienced bedbugs away or at home...oh shit, I'm all itchy now just thinking about parasites.

Monday, May 11, 2009

Stuff - boxes and bags of Stuff

For those of you who still have parents among the living, you may not fully realize how much Stuff can accumulate in oh....80 or so years. It's probably rude to ask them to begin culling their belongings. My mother really only had 50 years of Stuff in the house as she moved to VT after her first husband passed away. I loved my mother. But in all honesty did she really need to keep:

  • All her dress clothes that stopped fitting her over a decade ago.
  • Her dress shoes, when she stopped wearing heels.
  • Her cassettes once she graduated to CD's.
  • The portable hood hairdryer.
  • Around 200 haircurlers.
  • A bazillion tupperwear containers.
  • Old, old, old booze. Booze that was in the house when I was a teenager. I won't even drink it now.
  • Spices. She stopped cooking when dad died. She never used the spices anyway. Again, been there since my childhood. The oregano is grey.

Fortunately ( so far ) my brother has moved into the house. So we don't really need to be Hell-bent on hoeing out. However it is a Project and a half. Once I get it under control, I'm going to simplify things here at home.

Monday, March 30, 2009

Congratulations To ~

Leigh and her family as they welcome home a daughter!

Thursday, March 26, 2009


If I learned to bellydance, I can learn to do this. But where!?!?!

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Do This

When my sister-in-law died in 2000 at age 39 from leukemia I put myself on the National Bone Marrow Registry. All it took was a q-tip along the gum line. Her sons, my nephews are in college now. I keep wondering if there had been a match for her out in the world. Maybe they just didn't know about the Registry, or they did and didn't take the time to maybe make a difference.

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Ending. (Or Beginning, Or Middle If You're The Minion)

My mother passed away Tuesday morning. I'm okay. Really. The last couple weeks were when I mourned her. When she became a shell of pain instead of the witty lady I loved. The Minion has a Zen-like mindset thing going lately and is sticking with the re-incarnation angle. I'm just going with the being glad it's over for her angle. I knew I was stressed and exhausted but until I crawled into bed last night I didn't realize how completely spent I was. I slept the best sleep in probably three years. Because I didn't have to worry any longer.

She was highly organized, so there has been very little I've had to do arrangement wise. Three cheers for pre-planning. It's not morbid. It saves your loved ones having to think when they are most likely shattered. There's plenty to do without having to wonder whether to go with the upscale casket or the cardboard box for cremation. Like my dad said: "I want the damn cardboard box! Why burn up good money? Why should I care what I'm in? I'll be dead!"

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

Palliative Care

A couple of you ( the two that read but don't comment...don't look innocently around; you know who you are) know that my mother has been very ill for the last few weeks. Well, today I get to decide whether or not to keep the fluid IV going. She's not aware of much. She hasn't eaten in weeks and won't keep a feeding tube in, so that was nixed a while back. She hasn't taken her regular medication for days. We're at the end of the line here. When I told my mother I would be the decision maker ( or is it "decider"..lol ), I knew it would be a crummy job. And it truly is a crummy job. I keep wondering if I should put a Danby marble urn on hold at Brewster's. I need one for her so she and dad are a matching pair, for bookends. Seriously. And she knew this. And thought it was a great idea.

I'm tired. I want to sleep all the time. Stress is exhausting. Even The Minion mentioned that I look awful. Sweet boy that he is. The only way I'm remaining sane through this emotional shit-storm is to think of things like the following:

Has anyone ever wondered why the numbers on phonepads and remotes are the reverse direction on a calculator? That bit of weird has been bugging me for days.

Monday, February 16, 2009

Pot and Pans

I like to think it doesn't take a whole lot to make me happy. One of the things that helps keep me happy is when I get home from work and find that the pot I soaked the night before has been washed. When I get home and the pot is still in the sink, or has been moved out of the sink and set of the counter...well, that really vexes me. But I take a deep breath. Then another. Expel all the irritation. And simply wash the pot. Because I know ~ and apparently I am the only one in the house that realizes this ~ that the DishWashing Fairy is not coming by to sprinkle magic cleansing dust. The DishWashing Fairy is a myth. And I am going out on a limb here by guessing that the unwashed pot doesn't bother the S.O one bit. Therefore a conversation about unwashed pots would be a complete waste of my time.

So, who wants to guess whether the pot from last night has been washed at some point today?

Saturday, February 7, 2009

2nd Alter Ego

Cloistered Clarice ,the Dervish, isn't as busty as Eleanor ~ she may need to go shopping with Leigh.

Wednesday, February 4, 2009


This is Eleanor. She's a level 20 Elementalist / Mesmer. Which means besides looking fabulous in her incredible armor, she can rain fire upon and suck energy from her enemies.

Some days I really enjoy being Eleanor. Click the pic to see her in all her splendid loveliness.

Monday, January 26, 2009

At Last

The First Couple ~ so obviously smitten and Beyonce. Fabulous!

The Next Generation of Blue

He actually begged for something worthy in Walmart.
Yes, that is the President ( I get weepy just typing that word ), next to Spidey and the Harry Potter gang on the Minion's wall.
Pay no attention to the fan ( May-Sept. usage ) or the plug-in pumpkin (October) ~ I am terrible that way. I still have to take the Christmas tree down too.

Friday, January 23, 2009

Top Five

Catherine ~ in no particular order:

Six Wives ( 800 plus pages of historical text on Henry VIII's unfortunate Queens )

The Audacity of Hope ( No need to link this one)

Waiter Rant ( a must for anyone who has worked on the floor or behind the Line )

Shadow Child and The Gore ( Joe Cirtro scares the bejeezuz out of me. Creepy familiar surroundings. Makes going out to the woodpile after dark a deeply spooky and hurried experience.)

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

I Know I Read Alot ...

Last Spring I began keeping a notebook of all the books / authors I read; because honestly, I get confused at the library sometimes and take out something I'd already read but forgotten about. I decided to do a "head-count" the other night. I've read 53 books in 9 months. I swear I do other things, like feed The Minion, laundry, water the plants. Honest, I do.

Sunday, January 18, 2009

Like A Comfy Old Surreal Slipper

I've picked up my worn copy of Tom Robbins' Jitterbug Perfume. For the uninitiated, Mr. Robbins is a Salvador Dali painting in book form. As full bodied as a Merlot. Sticky and juicy like a peach. Salacious and bouncy goodness. He makes you dissect the importance of everything from cigarette packs to beets. I've tried to recall why I underlined certain passages; they must have struck me as vastly important back in 1990. I'm sure I'll underline this time around as well.

Since scent is the main focus of Jitterbug, I've been thinking about how scent triggers memory. Old Woodsman bug dope: my dad. Peppers and onions: my grandmother's house. People tell me how nice I smell ~ Mayan Gold, I've worn it for years ~ I'm unable to smell it after about an hour but other people can.

Had a flying dream last night. It was diagonal flying. Which was different.

Friday, January 16, 2009

On The Nightstand Or Piled On the Floor...

I usually have 4 or 5 books going at once. And they are usually pretty varied, but I think I've tipped to the extremes this time with the two that are dueling it out for my complete attention. First off we have Dry Storeroom No.1: The Secret Life of the Natural History Museum. Then we have Flesh House, it takes alot to disturb me ~ but I think Stuart MacBride has done it. And he has a fairly twisted page on his website as well.

Fossils or cannibalized flesh? Some days it's hard for a girl to decide.